Why people repeat hidden behavioural patterns - and how they shape risk
Available on
Audible & Amazon
Author
Eric Berne
Behaviour Stage
Culture
Overview
Games People Play introduces the concept of Transactional Analysis, a framework for understanding how people communicate, manipulate, and repeat behavioural patterns in everyday interactions. Eric Berne argues that much of human communication isn’t straightforward or rational, but follows predictable “games”: repeated social behaviours with hidden motives, unspoken rules, and familiar outcomes. These games allow people to avoid vulnerability, maintain power, or reinforce identity... often without realising they’re doing it.
Rather than focusing on isolated conversations, the book exposes the patterns beneath them. It categorises common psychological games people play at work, in relationships, and in organisations, showing how these behaviours persist because they feel safe, familiar, or socially rewarded. Once you can recognise the game being played, you can interrupt it.. and choose a more honest, productive interaction instead.
Why this matters for security behaviour
Games People Play matters for security behaviour because many security failures are rooted not in ignorance, but in unspoken social dynamics. People avoid reporting mistakes to save face, defer responsibility to avoid blame, or comply with authority even when something feels wrong.
These are behavioural “games”... predictable patterns driven by fear, status, and social pressure. Understanding these dynamics helps explain why people bypass controls, stay silent during incidents, or follow risky instructions. Security-aware cultures depend on breaking these games and encouraging more direct, adult-to-adult communication... especially under pressure.
Key Takeaways
- People follow patterns, not policies
Behaviour is often driven by habit and social roles rather than conscious decision making
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Many interactions have hidden motives
What’s said openly is often less important than what’s being protected, avoided, or signalled
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Power and authority strongly influence behaviour
People may comply with risky requests to maintain hierarchy or approval
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Avoidance behaviours feel safer than honesty
Silence, deflection, and blame-shifting are common responses to perceived risk
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Awareness disrupts repetition
Simply recognising a behavioural “game” makes it easier to step out of it
- Healthy cultures encourage adult-to-adult communication
Clear, direct, psychologically safe conversations reduce risk far more effectively than rules alone